Like every other relationship, Islam imposes rights and duties on parents and children as well. Islam is a full code of life and knows that every relation should have some duties and responsibilities towards each other. These rights and duties are imposed to make create a harmony between the relations. Right and duties and restrictions of parents and children are as under.
Rights of children (duties of parents)
Choose a good spouse
It is the right of a child to have good parents. A man should choose a good and righteous wife and a girl should choose a righteous man so the child can become righteous.
2. Right of life
Do not kill them. Abortion is killing of children before birth so parents should not do it.
Right of inheritance
It is also a pre-birth right. Sometimes, a father dies before the delivery of the child but this does not deprive the child from inheritance.
The right of will
If the parents are making their will before the birth of the child then he will also be rightful to get a share in the will.
No Hadd punishment
If a mother is liable for punishment under Hadd, she is exempt from this punishment until she gives the birth to the child because the punishment can be fatal for child.
Right of maintenance
A father is liable for maintenance of child before and after birth. If a husband divorces his wife before delivery, even then he is liable for maintaining the wife just because of the unborn.
After birth rights
- Put something sweet in mouth of new-born. Dates are Sunnah. Put a very small amount of piece of mashed dates in the mouth of child.
- Giving Adhaan in the ears of the child.
- Give the child a good name.
- Circumcise the male child
- Shaving the head of the child because it is healthy for child.
- To give the money or gold or silver in charity which is equal to the weight of the child’s shaved hairs.
- Sacrifice one ram for a girl and two rams for a boy.
- Accommodate the children.
- Install good Islamic mannerism
- Teach them Quran
- Teach them basic Arabic language so that they can understand Quran without difficulty.
- Be an example for them. Rather than just giving speeches, teach them with your behavior.
- Give them good education.
- Respect your children.
- Teach them the obligation of Islam like Salah, Fasting etc
- Acknowledge their likes and dislikes.
- Do not suppress the feelings and emotions of children.
- Ask their permission before getting them married.
- Don’t sacrifice the desires of children.
- When they become adult, let them make their decisions.
- Love the children.
- Maintain the children until they are adult.
- Pray for the children.
- Do not curse the children.
- Do not bash the kids.
- Stop being hypocrites so that your children will not learn to be hypocrite.
- Be realistic and don’t expect children to retain the culture you have learnt because time is changing continuously.
- Don’t put the burden of your own dreams on the shoulder of the children.
- Do not discriminate between the children.
- Do not torture the children.
- Speak kindly to the child.
- Trust them in their decisions.
- Do not humiliate the children.
Drawbacks of not fulfilling the rights of children
There are many disadvantages of not giving children their rights.
- They cannot become good Muslims.
- They will suffer because of the parents.
- They can become rebels.
- They can indulge in bad habits.
- They will end up being hypocrites.
- They will disrespect parents.
- They can leave parents.
- They can become psycho or mentally sick.
Rights of parents and duties of children
Like the duties, parents do have rights as well. Islam gives parents rights on their children which are as under.
- Respect your parents.
- Treat them with love.
- Take care of parents.
- Trust the parents.
- Do not be impatient with them.
- Do not throw them out of the house.
- Be grateful to them for everything they have done for you.
- Pray for parents.
- Be kind to them.
- Do not argue with them.
- Please them which is permissible in Islam.
- Obey them but only in reasonable matters.
- If one disagrees with parents tell them in respectable manner.
- Do not neglect the parents
- Accommodate them when they get older.
- Do not bash or abuse them.
- Do not transgress them
- Look after them and their needs.
Rights of parents after death
- It is the right of the parents that children will act upon their wills and testaments.
- To give sadqa for their deceased parents.
- To do good deeds. This can help parents in raising their levels in Jannah.
- To repay their debts if any.
- Be kind and good to relatives of parents.
If you find any mistake in this article please feel free to contact us and point it out. We will try to correct it in the light of Quran and Sunnah. May Allah bless us all with the authentic knowledge of Islam. May this effort of ours ease the way of jannah for our family.